earsucker

Per Life Style Extra:

Madonna has become the world’s highest paid female singer.

The ‘Material Girl’ singer earned an astonishing £26.6 million in 2004 which landed her a place in the new Guinness Book of Records, published today (29.09.06).

I remember first listening to Madonna and thinking that Cyndi Lauper was better. Of course, I was probably ten or twelve at the time. It’s not that she has amazing talent or anything, she was just provocative and unleashed. She broke precedents when it came to her presentation. While her vocal ability has always been mediocre at best and there are other more talented singers out there that get little or no attention, Madonna has kept herself in the spotlight for quite some time now.

Madonna at her best:

Verdict: Anyone that knocks Britney out of the limelight is alright with me.

Again perusing Myspace, I stumbled upon Swordbearer. Upon first listen to the first track, “Inspired By The Trees”, I was thinking that this is not a bad folk song. Again searching in the Black Metal genre, it wasn’t exactly what I was looking for. Thank God I stuck around long enough to listen to “They Came By Wind And Sail”. This guy is an 18 year old kid from Glen Gardner, NJ and get this, it’s all only him.

In his own words:

Anyway, all of the songs are originals that I have created by myself, using only guitar, keyboards, wooden flute, and vocals.

“Season Of Harvest” sounds like a metal mix of some arabian track where the guy tries to get the snake out of the basket with his flute. Almost two minutes into the song, it changes tempo for a few seconds, but it recomposes itself, then melodically inducing your ears to listen to more.

The final track, “Behold I Am The Night” is a slow metal song with slow, mellow, and dark vocals.

Verdict: Metal infused with folk music? I’d have said, ‘eww, no’, but I’m glad I listened before judgment. Swordbearer rocks.

Via Myspace, is Emcee G The Collective Family. First of all, when listening to this track, I had to continuously readjust the volume on my speakers. The volume goes up and down. I’m not really sure what is going on in this song. It sounds like some old school Archie Bunker sounding music in the background and some guy trying to rap. The background noise drowns out the rapper, and you’re left wondering what you just poisoned your ears with.

This song is listed under several categories, one of which being Black Metal. Definitely unnapropriate here.

I hope that they can get back in the studio and perfect whatever sound that they are trying to accomplish here before unleashing it on the world. This is some scary stuff and I’m not afraid of anything.

Want some real black metal for a band that’s actually good and can use your support? Check out Legion of Doom. This IS Black Metal, folks.

Verdict: The lone pic of that guy on their myspace page isn’t even worth posting.

Per an article at Yahoo News,

MTV announced Wednesday that the rap group will star in a new reality comedy series called “Adventures in Hollyhood.”

The series, which will begin in 2007, will follow the group’s main members, Juicy J and DJ Paul, and their entourage as they make their way from Memphis to Los Angeles.

And now for a collar poppin’ vid clip:

Straight out of the 80′s, comes Max Headroom. I got this link via Fark. Woot, I miss the 80′s. Enjoy this vid clip:

Via Yahoo, I read that Amy Grant was honored with a star on the Walk of Fame.

Grant was a teenage floor sweeper at a music studio when an executive overheard a tape of her songs. She recorded her first album in 1977.

A vid clip of the ceremony:

Hat tip to this fan for being there to take pics and the video for the event.

Lyrics by Beck

I really think I better get a hold of myself
Don’t wanna let the night get ahead of myself
Whisperin’ her love through a smoke ring smile
She doesn’t know what happens when she’s around

I think I’m in love
But it makes me kinda nervous to say so
I think I’m in love
But it makes me kinda nervous to say so

Doodododododooodoo

Probably lay my head on a wooden floor
Tell her I was tired from working the store
Counting all the cash from an old shoebox
Saving up to buy her something she wants

I think I’m in love
But it makes me kinda nervous to say so
I think I’m in love
But it makes me kinda nervous to say so

What if it’s wrong?
What if it’s wrong
To pray in vain?
What does it mean
To fake your death?
To wake up tainted?

Take a little picture in a photobooth
Keep it in a locket and I think of you
Both of our pictures, face to face
Take off your necklace and throw it away

I think I’m in love
But it makes me kinda nervous to say so
I think I’m in love
But it makes me kinda nervous to say so

Really think I better get a hold of myself
Don’t wanna let the night get ahead of myself
Whisperin’ her love through a smoke ring smile
She doesn’t know what happens when she’s around

I think I’m in love
Think I’m in love
Think I’m in love
Think I’m in love
Think I’m in love
Think I’m in love
Think I’m in love
Think I’m in love

I couldn’t grab the video because of the RIAA, but Buzznet has it.

Via Yahoo,

The 36-year-old founder of Bad Boy Records looked the part in sunglasses and flashy jewelry. He called some students on stage and talked to them one on one about their goals. His advice: work hard and stay in school.

“Take responsibility for your future. No excuses!” Combs said.

Does this sound to anyone else like a publicity stunt for his new album, “Press Play”?

Now, a song that doesn’t suck:

Via Yahoo, comes this story about Marshall and Kim Mathers.

Macomb County Circuit Judge Antonio Viviano told reporters after the hearing that the case was being referred to a mediator. Lawyers for Eminem and Kimberley Mathers said a date for mediation hasn’t been set.

Eminem’s lawyer Harvey Hauer and Kimberley Mathers’ lawyer Michael J. Smith said they hope the case will be settled amicably.

On 4/9, I blogged about their first split here.

Well, ladies, Mr. Mathers is going to be available again soon.

And for a vid:

Jump In My Car
by David Hasselhoff

Hoff: Jump in my car, I wanna take you home. Mmm, jump in my car, it’s too far to walk on your own.
Girls: No thank you sir.
Hoff: Ah, c’mon, I’m a trustworthy guy.
Girls: No thank you sir.
Hoff: Oh little girl I wouldn’t tell you no lie
Girls: I know your game
Hoff: How can you say that, we only just met
Girls: You’re all the same
Hoff: Ooh, she’s got me there, but I’ll get her yet
Girls: I got you there
Hoff: No you didn’t, I was catching my breath. And look it’s starting to rain and baby you’ll catch your death.
Girls: Well, I don’t know
Hoff: Ah, come on it costs nothing to try. And you’ll arrive home nice and dry.

Hoff: Jump in my car, I wanna take you home. C’mon jump in my car, it’s too far to walk on your own.

Hoff: Jump in my car, I wanna take you home. C’mon jump in my car, it’s too far to walk on your own.
Girls: Well maybe I will.
Hoff: Ah, that’s better now, you’re talking sense.
Girls: You best be keep still.
Hoff: Well, if you like I’ll just put up a fence.
Girls: No need to get smart.
Hoff: Well alright we’ll soon be on our way.
Girls: We better start.
Hoff: What for?
Girls: Because it’s such a long way.
Hoff: Well, why, where d’you live?
Girls: I live down south, it’s roughly eighty-four miles.
Hoff: Hey slow down, you must be joking there behind that cute smile.
Girls: Oh, no I’m not.
Hoff: Well, if you’re not there’s only one thing to say.
Girls: And what’s that?
Hoff: Get out the car, get on your way.

Hoff: Get out of my car.
Girls: But you just said that you’d take me home.
Hoff: Well, it’s just too far.
Girls: But there’s no way that I can get there alone.
Hoff: I couldn’t care less.
Girls: Maybe I could see you next week.
Hoff: But you look a mess.
Girls: Look who’s talking, you got no right to speak.

Hoff: Get out of my car!
Girls: You told me that you’re a really nice guy
Hoff: Well I am… Yeah! Get out of my car. Get out! Get out of my car!

Via Break.com, comes “Weird” Al Yankovic’s parody of Chamillionaire’s “Ridin Dirty”.

White & Nerdy

Enjoy!

Visit his myspace page here.

I wouldn’t buy this album if K-Fed promised me the world, let alone his used shoes that he wore to the Teen Choice Awards. K-Fed is a leech of the worst kind and he has no real talent. He is definitely riding on Britney’s coattails.

The shoes just happen to be the second place prize. First place gets a trip for two to L.A. for his Halloween album release party, which Brit will host.

They should fly me to L.A. just for getting through the entire album.

Utter nonsense. K-Fed, your fifteen minutes are up.

Possession of marijuana and narcotic mushrooms, that is. According to Yahoo, “a search of the bus produced 1 1/2 pounds of marijuana and 0.2 pounds of narcotic mushrooms, according to state police.”

Woot, Willie got high! Shame on politicians for not decriminalizing this stuff already. What’s the worst that can happen? He drives the speed minimum and thinks he’s going lightning fast?

Ya gotta be a big jerk for busting Willie.

Here’s a vid:

In this commercial, this guy is attempting to get a job as a brewer for this company. This is too funny to ignore…

Enjoy!

Lukas Rossi performed Radiohead’s “Creep” better than the original singer. Destined to become Tommy Lee’s (insert band name here) lead singer, Lukas won that role on the show Rockstar. Supernova was a band name already in use when Tommy Lee attempted to dub his band with that name. The original Supernova, a punk band, sought an injunction to protect the name and won. Tommy Lee & Co. are searching for another name as we speak. Anyone want to speculate as to what they’ll name it?

Open comments :)

A video for your viewing pleasure:

Woohoo for Michael Stipe and Co. with this wonderful honor. Listening to R.E.M. reminds me of the times I lived at home with my parents and when MTV still played music.

This news is good enough for a vid:

Congratulations!

Actually, the entire interview with Iron Maiden’s frontman, Bruce Dickinson, can be found here. Here is a snippet:

“What we do is we are a heavy metal band and what we care about is our fans. That’s it. So our strength comes from that simplicity. You know, what do I care if I never appear on reality TV? ‘Fucking great, thank you! Can I have it in writing?’ But in her world, that’s really important. In her world, it’s really important what you look like. In her world, facelifts are really important. In my world, I don’t give a fuck. I get old and I get wrinkly. Who gives a shit?”

A musician that speaks up against Ozzfest and Sharon Osbourne?!? Bruce Dickinson and Iron Maiden are legends in the heavy metal arena and they wanna know, “Where are the kids?!??”. Not bowing to corporate hoopla and continuing to show fans everywhere, who’s the reigning boss of the heavy metal scene, it’s definitely Iron Maiden.

And now, for a video, “Wicker Man”:

According to Blabbermouth.net:

LED ZEPPELIN is set to be inducted into the UK Music Hall of Fame in November, alongside BRIAN WILSON, DUSTY SPRINGFIELD and ROD STEWART. Famed BEATLES producer Sir George Martin will receive an honorary membership in recognition of his services to British music.

This calls for a video:

Classic.

White & Nerdy————
Parody of “Ridin Dirty’” by Chamillionaire
New lyrics by Al Yankovic

They see me mowin’
My front lawn
I know they’re all thinking I’m so white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Can’t you see I’m white and nerdy?
Look at me, I’m white and nerdy
I wanna roll with
The gangstas
But so far they all think I’m too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
I’m just too white and nerdy.
Really really white and nerdy.

First in my class here at MIT
Got skills, I’m a champion at D&D
MC Escher – that’s my favorite MC
Keep your 40, I’ll just have an Earl Grey tea
My rims never spin, to the contrary
You’ll find that they’re quite stationary
All of my action figures are cherry
Steven Hawking’s in my library
My MySpace page is all totally pimped out
Got people beggin’ for my top eight spaces
Yo, I know pi to a thousand places
Ain’t got no grills but I still wear braces
I order all of my sandwiches with mayonnaise
I’m a whiz at Minesweeper – I could play for days
Once you see my sweet moves you’re gonna stay amazed
My fingers’ movin’ so fast I’ll set the place ablaze
There’s no killer app I haven’t run
At Pascal, well I’m number one
Do vector calculus just for fun
I ain’t got a gat but I got a soldering gun
Happy Days is my favorite theme song
I could sure kick your butt in a game of ping pong
I’ll ace any trivia quiz you bring on
I’m fluent in JavaScript as well as Klingon

They see me roll on
My Segway
I know in my heart they think I’m white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Can’t you see I’m white and nerdy
Look at me, I’m white and nerdy
I’d like to roll with
The gangstas
Although it’s apparent I’m too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
I’m just too white and nerdy
How’d I get so white and nerdy

I’ve been browsin’, inspectin’
X-Men comics, you know I collect ‘em
The pens in my pocket, I must protect ‘em
My ergonomic keyboard never leaves me bored
Shopping online for deals on some writable media
I edit Wikipedia
I memorized Holy Grail really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
I got a business doing websites
When my friends need some code, who do they call?
I do HTML for ‘em all
Even made a homepage for my dog
Yo, I got myself a fanny pack
They were havin’ a sale down at The Gap
Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap
Pop, pop, hope no one sees me
Gettin’ freaky
I’m nerdy in the extreme
And whiter than sour cream
I was in AV Club and Glee Club and even the Chess Team
Only question I
Ever thought was hard
Was do I like Kirk
Or do I like Picard
Spend every weekend at the Renaissance Fair
Got my name on my underwear

They see me strollin’
They laughin’
And rollin’ their eyes ’cause I’m so white and nerdy
Just because I’m white and nerdy
Just because I’m white and nerdy
All because I’m white and nerdy
Holy cow, I’m white and nerdy
I wanna bowl with
The gangstas
But, oh well, it’s obvious I’m white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
Think I’m just too white and nerdy
I’m just too white and nerdy
Look at me, I’m white and nerdy

Listening to some death metal this morning while perusing Myspace, I happened upon “Soulless Heart”. This band is pure metal, make no mistake. The first track I treated my ears to was “DoubleEdged Switchblade”. This song has ripping vocals and Slayer infused guitar riffs. This is slashing death metal with sounds that you will recognize. The vocals are dark and loud, definitely a sound that one could appreciate. They sound heavily influenced by Megadeth, Slayer, and older Metallica (before they sucked). This is widely evident in the track “Lost Truth”.

Verdict: Give it a listen. The only thing I’d change is the logo.

Vesperian Sorrow sounds, at first, like a soundtrack to any horror flick. With eloquently put together keyboards and an influx of guitars meshed in nicely, it’s no wonder how they got 20k+ friends on Myspace.

In their own words:

Considered the premiere symphonic dark metal band in North America, Vesperian Sorrow’s music evokes the darkest depths of searing human tragedy juxtaposed with soaring heights of orchestrated symphonic melody.

I couldn’t have said that any better myself. It is a pleasurable mixing of keyboards, guitars, and some rockin’ metal vocals. Very melodic metal, but not in the 80′s hair band kind of way. My favorite track is “Twilight of Azrael”, give it a listen and you’ll see why. “Invisible Kingdom” invades your ears with the speed metal guitars and the awesomeness of it’s raw sound. The vocals of “Astrodramatica” remind me of Dani Filth, which is always a plus.

Bonus: They have their own website here.

Verdict: This is the best of the best in melodic speed metal with various creative influences infused. Buy “Regenesis Creation” today and make your dollar go further. Well worth it.

If you are into Goth/Alternative types of music, then you will be very pleased with this band’s offerings. The sound is not too mellow and the vocals are superb. Listen to them at their Myspace page and you will be pleasantly surprised. Sounding like a mixture of The Cure and Siouxsie & The Banshees, Cell Division definitely brings a unique blend of melodic goth-rock to your eardrums.

Verdict: This is good stuff. Won’t harm your ears in the slightest. This does not disappoint.

Video here

Spoken:
Dee de dee, doesn’t mean mentally retarded. It means stupid. This song goes out to all the stupid people out there, you’re gonna find this song hilarious, and you don’t even know…it’s about you.

[Verse 1]
You dropped out of school cause you’re smarter than everybody
I got three words for you dumbass, “Ding, fries ready”
You try to outrun a bull, but nobody’s that fast
That’s how you end up, with a horn stuck up your ass
Roethlisberger needs no helmet cause he’s a star
But the year the bus left, he got hit by a car
You wanna go huntin’ for quail someplace
Don’t go with Cheney, he’ll put a fuckin shot in your face
If you bungee jump so you can fly through the air
I ain’t upset you ended up in that wheelchair
You ignore all the warnings, yeah you light up a smoke
Now you have to talk with a machine through your throat

[Chorus]
How many idiots can there be?
Some say that it’s 1 out of 3
If you don’t know then take it from me
You’re the dee dee dee

(spoken) you you you
dee dee dee

And if you are a Dee
Please don’t marry a Dee
Cause then your kids will be (what? what?)
Dee dee dee

(spoken) dee dee dee

[Verse 2]
You cry about the price of gas and war in Iraq
But you voted Bush in twice what were you smokin, crack?
Didn’t get a prenup, though you knew she was a skank
Now you’ve got herpes and she’s got half your bank
You were on top of the world with “Hit Me Baby One More Time”
Only a stupid bitch would marry Kevin Federline
You drink and drive and you think it’s okay
Now you’re cell mate’s weavin in and out the “hershey highway”
When you put tigers on your show and they can’t be free
They’ll bite your neck off and then you’ll say (chokingly) “dee dee dee” (cough)

[Chorus]
How many idiots can there be?
Some say that it’s 1 out of 3
If you don’t know then take it from me
You’re the dee dee dee

(spoken) you you you
Eee dee dee

And if you are a Dee
Please don’t marry a Dee
It’s genetics don’t you see?
Your kids will be dee dee dee

(spoken)
That’s what they’re gonna be: DEE DEE DEE!!!

[Verse 3]
Parents are to blame for all these dee dee dee’s
Letting their kids drop out and not get GED’s
You keep your kids inside cause there’s freaks on the loose
But yet you let them drink from Michael Jackson’s “Jesus Juice”?
You don’t care when your kids come home with D’s from class
What you need to do is get some balls and beat that ass
He isn’t stupid, you say he’s got A.D.D.
It’s that his mom and his dad are both dee dee dee!

[Bridge]
This test is too hard! (So they lower the standards)
I’m not good at sports! (So they give them all trophies)
My dad used to spank me (So they lower the standards)
I’m too fat for this seat (So they widen the standards)
They say no cause I’m black (So they lower the standards)
They say no cause I’m white (So they lower the standards)
They say no cause I’m Asian (So they lower the standards)
No habla Englais (So we all become Spaniards)
And you wake up one day and you don’t have the skills
To get a better job so you’re stuck on the grill
You’re wondering why Julio took your job
But you forget to see, you’re as dumb as a knob
Your ass is too fat to get out of the house
While you’re eating more food trying to figure it out
So they outsource your job to some guy named Habib
Cause he works harder than you and he’s got 5 degrees
And you’re asking yourself how could this happen to me
I’ll tell you why, homie! Cause you’re….dee dee dee

Dee dee dee
Dee dee dee
(Hat tip to Midnyte & Halog33k)