earsucker

In Touch Weekly’s latest cover features the new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton and Prince William with a story that reveals “she can’t get pregnant”.

Their story features “Will & Kate’s Baby Heartbreak” with a “royal doctor” confirming that the Duchess cannot conceive a royal heir. Yes, this “devastating news” would “rock their marriage” if it were true. Somehow, I don’t think that the tabloid has a snitch on the inside of Kate and William’s doctor’s office.

In addition to all of that heartbreak, it appears that they can’t adopt a baby, either. Heartbreak all around! Oh, In Touch, you’ve created so many fictitious babies for Jennifer Aniston, yet you couldn’t find it in your heart to give one to Kate? Come on.

In this issue, we’re also treated to Brad Pitt and Angelina fighting over a woman, along with Charlie Sheen threatening Ashton Kutcher, and of course, Jessica Simpson’s $1 million wedding.

What do you think of the cover? Are they full of it? I guess we’ll find out if Kate conceives, Brangelina divorces over a woman and Ashton winds up assaulted by a warlock.