earsucker

After his future bride, Kim Kardashian, took the whole famewhoring Kardashian clan to taste test some cakes for their upcoming wedding, Kris Humphries kicked back while doing some clothes shopping. This guy just has no idea what he’s in for, does he?

Man, he’s lucky if he’s going to see August 21st, because Kim’s butt may just crush him. Kidding, it’ll actually because he’s become so sick to death of seeing his own face on every tabloid cover between here and Timbuktu, Africa. Ha. He’ll be overpowered by the result of his marriage to the biggest tabloid queen known to man. I feel for him.

Dude, it’s not too late to get out now. You can do it, there’s still time!

You know he won’t, though. Meanwhile, soak up those last few minutes of freedom. You’ve seen how she was at the bachelor party (spoiler alert: she crashed it), so it’s only a matter of time before momager Kris Jenner is managing his everyday life in the spotlight as she laughs all the way to the bank.

Photo Credit: Fame Pictures