earsucker

Canadian singer Alanis Morissette has confirmed the news that she is pregnant by her new husband, MC Souleye.

The twosome got married in May 2010 after only dating for seven months. She has just announced that she is expecting their first child.

The official news will be featured in an upcoming issue of Us Weekly.

Congratulations!!

Beyonce took home six Grammys tonight and performed her song “If I Were A Boy”, along with a cover of Alanis Morissette’s “You Oughtta Know”.

“If I Were A Boy” was pretty good, but she murdered “You Oughtta Know”. No one should ever be allowed to cover that song unless they know for sure that they can rock it.

Check out her performances after the jump! (continue reading…)

Yes, Alanis Morissette loves her some weed. I can just picture her curled up in a chair watching “The View”, toking from a bong. Wait, what?

She says that she uses the “herb” to help along her songwriting process…because there are only so many songs you can write about your cheating ex?

She said, “I’m all about moderation – as best I can be. As an artist, there’s a sweet jump-startng quality to it for me. I’ve often felt telepathic and receptive to inexplicable messages my whole life. I can stave those off when I’m not high. When I’m high – well, they come in and there’s less of a veil, so to speak. So if I ever need some clarity…or a quantum leap in terms of writing something, it’s a quick way for me to get to it.”

If that wasn’t tl;dr enough for you, she goes on…and on…and on:

She added, “I have a lot of friends who have wanted to specifically quit smoking marijuana because they felt that it was having a negative effect on their lives, and I absolutely supported them doing so. Then I have other friends who I’ve coerced into smoking because I thought it would be great for them. I’ve always resonated with people who are on the front lines. I’ve always felt that way about [boyfriend] Tom [Ballanco] and about the community around him – Woody Harrelson, Alicia Silverstone. I have a lot of friends around me who are very courageous and willing to ‘come out’ – and Tom is definitely beyond the front lines. Any fears that I had about cannabis were quickly assuaged. Now I feel like a professional!”

Thoughts?

Image Credit: Bauer-Griffin

What do you think? You like??

[Photo Credit: Newscom]

Incidentally, I just had to use this picture, for the “jagged little pill” that Alanis Morissette got from this blogger:

So that’s it. The end. God speed Alanis, you wanker. I hope whatever religion you embrace late in life reincarnates you and your publicist as factory farm chickens pumped full of hormones.

Apparently he was going to be paid to profile her concert at Madison Square Garden, after interviewing her, and was subsequently screwed out of $200 because Alanis was too lazy to do the interview.

Get ‘er!

PS. I really love Matchbox Twenty. Grr.

Exposing the dumb lyrics to the popular Black-eyed Peas song, “My Humps”, comes Alanis Morisette. This satirical and insanely funny rendition of the song makes me wonder if the popular bands out there are just writing down just anything to record. Alanis points this out nicely and begs the question, “what ever happened to real talent?”

Kudos.

Lyrics

“My Humps”

What you gon’ do with all that junk?
All that junk inside your trunk?
I’ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps (Check it out)

I drive these brothers crazy,
I do it on the daily,
They treat me really nicely,
They buy me all these ices.
Dolce & Gabbana,
Fendi and NaDonna
Karan, they be sharin’
All their money got me wearin’ fly
Brother I ain’t askin,
They say they love my ass ‘n,
Seven Jeans, True Religion’s,
I say no, but they keep givin’
So I keep on takin’
And no I ain’t taken
We can keep on datin’
I keep on demonstrating.

My love (love), my love, my love, my love (love)
You love my lady lumps (love),
My hump, my hump, my hump (love),
My humps they got you,

She’s got me spending.
(Oh) Spendin’ all your money on me and spending time on me.
She’s got me spendin’.
(Oh) Spendin’ all your money on me, up on me, on me

What you gon’ do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I’ma get, get, get, get, you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What you gon’ do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I’m a make, make, make, make you scream
Make you scream, make you scream.
Cos of my hump (ha), my hump, my hump, my hump (what).
My hump, my hump, my hump (ha), my lovely lady lumps (Check it out)

I met a girl down at the disco.
She said hey, hey, hey yea let’s go.
I could be your baby, you can be my honey
Let’s spend time not money.
I mix your milk wit my cocoa puff,
Milky, milky cocoa,
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.

They say I’m really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standing next to me,
Always dancing next to me,
Tryin’ a feel my hump, hump.
Lookin’ at my lump, lump.
You can look but you can’t touch it,
If you touch it I’ma start some drama,
You don’t want no drama,
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama
So don’t pull on my hand boy,
You ain’t my man, boy,
I’m just tryn’a dance boy,
And move my hump.

My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump.
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
My lovely lady lumps (lumps)
In the back and in the front (lumps)
My lovin’ got you,

She’s got me spendin’.
(Oh) Spendin’ all your money on me and spending time on me.
She’s got me spendin’.
(Oh) Spendin’ all your money on me, up on me, on me.

What you gon’ do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I’ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off my hump.
What you gon’ do with all that ass?
All that ass inside them jeans?
I’ma make, make, make, make you scream
Make you scream, make you scream.
What you gon’ do with all that junk?
All that junk inside that trunk?
I’ma get, get, get, get you drunk,
Get you love drunk off this hump.
What you gon’ do wit all that breast?
All that breast inside that shirt?
I’ma make, make, make, make you work
Make you work, work, make you work.

(A-ha, a-ha, a-ha, a-ha)
(A-ha, a-ha, a-ha, a-ha)
(A-ha, a-ha, a-ha, a-ha)
(A-ha, a-ha, a-ha, a-ha)

She’s got me spendin’.
(Oh) Spendin’ all your money on me and spendin’ time on me
She’s got me spendin’.
(Oh) Spendin’ all your money on me, up on me, on me.