earsucker

Bill and Giuliana Rancic are featured on the cover of the May 14th issue of “Us Weekly” magazine. The tabloid has an interview with the happy couple who speak on the topic of finally having a baby after learning that Giuliana had cancer.

The magazine dives into the couple’s four year struggle to have a child together. Giuliana has gone through two unsuccessful IVF procedures, a miscarriage and a battle with cancer that resulted in a double mastectomy. On April 23rd, the duo announced on “The Today Show” that they were expecting a baby together via a gestational carrier. They are expecting their new addition this summer.

Also featured in this issue are Tori Spelling and Shannen Doherty putting their former “90210″ feud behind them. In addition the magazine covers Lauren Conrad’s new love and Khloe Kardashian choosing her family over fame.

Us Weekly features Pippa Middleton’s “big mistake”, which of course, is her involvement in “GunGate”. After partying it up with friends the night before, Pippa appeared in an Audi convertible with several guy friends. When they found out that they were being tailed by the paparazzi, the driver stopped and pulled out a toy gun on him. At the time, the snapper was unaware that the weapon was fake, so it caused a bit of outrage.

The tabloid reports that Kate Middleton is standing by her sister in the wake of all of the gun drama, facing the wrath of the Palace together.

A royal source said, “This is embarrassing for them”, adding that the gun incident “has put Kate in a very difficult position.”

It was already revealed that Pippa would not be investigated as a result of the incident. So, basically we’re not seeing what the big deal is to keep throwing her name out there. It’s not like the gun was in her hands. She didn’t wave it. She laughed when the driver pointed it at the photographer, but perhaps she knew it was fake beforehand? Still, it had to have been scary for the paparazzo who was following them. Don’t you think? They should at least apologize to him.

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s romance is covered on the latest copy of Us Weekly magazine with the title “True Romance Or Desperate Stunt”. We are not at all surprised that someone was willing to jump on the “It’s all for fake PR” bandwagon and it appears that Us Weekly was willing to oblige — instead of kissing Kardashian butt like they’ve done in the past. We’re guessing that Kim no longer cares what the tabloids are going to write about her, as long as she’s covered somewhere.

The tabloid states that after years of flirting, Kanye has finally convinced Kim to give their romance a shot. The magazine claims to go inside their shopping sprees, lavish dinners and a Paris getaway. Of course, now it sounds like they’ve got some sort of Kardashian insider on speed dial.

Do we really care how the sublimely rich are spending their gobs upon gobs of money?

Also featured in this issue, the magazine claims that Katy Perry wants her soon-to-be ex-husband Russell Brand back. Uh huh, somehow we’re doubting that this has any truth to it. In addition, it’s being said that Halle Berry is jealous of Sandra Bullock. Interesting. Lastly, they’ve got an article on Teen Mom’s Leah Messer and how she’s been pressured to get married.

Kim Kardashian filed for divorce from Kris Humphries on October 31st and now it appears that the divorce is lasting way longer than their marriage. They gave it 72 days and then Kim called time on their union, citing irreconcilable differences. He called BS on that and said that their marriage should be annulled — because it was based on fraud.

Kris Jenner or one of those Kardashian broads have obviously run to Us Weekly to blather on about how Kim just wants to be free from Kris. Of course we kind of knew that already, considering that she filed for divorce from him. Still, the magazine is claiming that Kim is humiliated and desperate for Kris to set her free.

The magazine also reports that Kris is plotting to get Kim’s money and if that’s not bad enough — he also wants to ruin her name. HAHAHA. Like anything Kris Humphries could do could ruin her name any worse than she already has? Is that even possible?

One word answer: NO.

Two days ago, we told our readers that Jersey Shore star Snooki was pregnant and engaged to her beau Jionni LaValle and as it turns out, we were right!

At the time, we had heard rumors that Snooks wasn’t going to confirm the news until she could get a payout from a tabloid. It looks like Us Weekly took the bait — as she is confirming the pregnancy and engagement news on their latest magazine cover.

The cover reads, “A newly engaged Snooki opens up about her panic after drinking in the first month, how she nearly ruined Jionni’s sweet proposal and her doubtful future on the Shore.”

Snooki says that she wants house music playing as she gives birth to their new bundle of joy. Is anyone curious as to what kind of mother Snooki’s going to be? She humps plants drunk, forgets where the beach is when it’s five feet in front of her and urinates on the dance floor. I wish I were kidding.

What should she name the baby guido/guidette that is currently occupying space in her uterus?

It’s almost as if Us Weekly just figured out how The Bachelor works. Apparently, the tabloid had no idea that the show’s star gets to hook up with three girls in one weekend. Ben Flajnik took the remaining three ladies, Courtney Robertson, Nicki Sterling and Lindzi Cox, to Switzerland for Monday’s show and invited all three back to their respective Fantasy Suites courtesy of the show’s host, Chris Harrison.

Now, Us Weekly claims that Ben was hooking up with the ladies. Duh. Of course he was, it’s reality television. Now for the shocker, they’re claiming that Ben was cheating! Is it really cheating if the other girls know that he’s doing the nasty with the other two?

I’d be more miffed if I was Nicki, considering how he hooked up with her and then subsequently ditched her afterward. The tabloid has exclusive photos of Ben’s cheating spree. It also reports that Ben proposed to Courtney, but now he’s embarrassed by her. Who wouldn’t be? She’s been quite the evil villain this season. After watching the show, he has to feel like a dolt.

The tabloid also reports that Courtney is in tears during the filming of the Women Tell All show. Are you going to watch? What secrets will be revealed when that airs? Hopefully someone will call him out for looking like the Geico Caveman and being so blinded by the fact that he landed a model that he was too dumb to realize how badly she was playing him.

Whitney Houston is featured on the latest cover of Us Weekly, with a feature on her “sad final days”. Whitney was found unconscious in the Beverly Hilton Hotel on February 11th, after it was said that she mixed Xanax and alcohol. Whitney’s had a long past with drugs, famously saying “crack is whack” back in a 2010 interview.

The late singer’s funeral is set for Saturday in her hometown of Newark, New Jersey. Her mother, Cissy Houston has requested that gospel singer Marvin Winans perform her eulogy. He also officiated her wedding to Bobby Brown in 1992.

Pastor Joe Carter, who is leading the service, said, “She was able to leave us with so many wonderful memories of that God-given gift. That’s what we are celebrating on Saturday.”

New Hope Baptist Church has seating for 1,500 people and the Pastor revealed that he expects “all these empty pews to be filled with people whose hearts are broken.”

We hope that she has found peace from all of her demons. Her talent was one-of-a-kind and will be missed greatly. We grew up listening to Whitney all throughout the nineties. It is such a shame that she had to go out like that. We send our condolences and prayers to their family in this tough time.

According to the latest issue of Us Weekly, Demi Moore has been partying with her daughter and chasing boys who are younger than her estranged husband, Ashton Kutcher. Once a cougar, always a cougar?

The tabloid is really just echoing what was revealed by People magazine in that Demi was just fearsome of growing older and wanted to hang onto youth. Their cover reveals that Demi turned back to drugs and self-destructs.

We’ve also heard reports that Demi was trying her best at getting a hookup with Zac Efron. He’s 24!

A source said, “She’s been really down, and she’s surrounding herself with young people to make her feel better. She’s been mixing pills and Red Bulls, among other things.”

On the topic of Zac, a pal revealed that Demi has inserted herself into Rumer’s social scene and has been trying to pick Zac up. The snitch added, “She calls him and texts him a lot, but he’s not interested at all. He thinks she’s a creepy cougar.”

Also featured in this issue is Kourtney Kardashian’s babymoon with boyfriend, Scott Disick. Because we all want to take photographers with us as we show our love for our partners, right?

The tabloid also reveals Seal’s new betrayal of estranged wife, Heidi Klum. “She feels used”, the cover reports. I can’t imagine it’s that bad if they’re both still wearing their wedding rings, can you?

Thoughts/

In case you’ve been watching The Bachelor, you know how much of a pain in the butt some of the ladies can be. At first we thought that Blakely would emerge as the show’s nastiest competitor, but alas, as it turns out, it’s actually the model, Courtney Robertson! Color us surprised (Spoiler alert: Not really.)

Read our latest recap of the show here, in case you haven’t been watching.

Obviously Ben Flajnik is blind to all of the things happening behind closed doors, but the public sees it. We see how nasty Courtney is with all of the other women. We’ve also heard the rumors that Ben ends up with Courtney. It’s not that shocking considering that the guy looks like the Geico Caveman in a suit.

The latest issue of Us Weekly features a piece on Courtney and her nastiness. She said on the premiere of the show, “With me, what you see is what you get.”

So it’s all nothing but nasty trashiness? Except when Ben is around, of course. An insider at the show said, “Nobody liked her.”

Former contestant, Amber Tierney, said that Courtney seemed cold. The spy also said “No one trusted her. Everyone referred to her as ‘the model who sits in the corner and plays with her hair.’ She didn’t feel the need to be nice.”

Eliminated emotional blogger, Jenna Burke, also said, “There was a serious case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.”

Of course she was nice when Ben came around! Duh. The insider added, “All the girls hoped Ben realizes who Courtney really is.”

He won’t. He’s probably already engaged to Courtney because he fears that he can’t do better than a model. Most likely, this was just a contest for her to keep her name in the media. Does she seem like the type of girl that would go for a guy like Ben? Seriously?

This week, Us Weekly manages to dive in behind the closed doors of Heidi Klum’s divorce from Seal. Their title? Behind Closed Doors: Heidi’s Private Hell.

Did things really get that bad between Heidi and Seal? We’ve heard rumors that his temper was the cause of their split, but they seemed to always put on a happy face for the cameras. So what went down behind closed doors?

According to the tabloid, there were vicious fights and jealousy, with four kids caught in the middle. They claim that Heidi and Seal’s nearly seven years of marriage was just a facade. A facade, really?!? Who gets married as a facade for that length of time and doesn’t have the last name of Kardashian?

Also featured in this issue is Taylor Armstrong, talking about how her former husband Russell almost killed her. In addition to that, they’ve got a feature on Kristin Cavallari’s pregnancy announcement and how that might have saved her engagement to Jay Cutler. Lastly, they are featuring Bachelor star Ben Flajnik, falling into Courtney Robertson’s web of deceit.

He needs to stop catering to Courtney already. Nobody likes this broad. If you’ve been watching the show, then you know how bad it is. She is totally conniving. We’ve heard the rumors that they end up together, but it’s most likely because the Geico Caveman couldn’t believe he was able to snare a model.

What do you think?

When the latest cover of Us Weekly emerged online yesterday, we were scratching our heads wondering what Katy Perry and Russell Brand were hiding in their marriage of 14 months. What would he have to reveal if he wanted to really go through with a tell all book?

The caption underneath his photo read “She’ll never forgive him”. When printing words like that, Us Weekly makes us think that Rusty tried to show Katy’s mother his rocket….

Alas, we’ve consulted the source and have come up with some juicy tidbits of information. The answer is just as simple as our attic troll brother Pat who lives in our mother’s attic and only comes out to eat and walk his dog. It’s the tell all book idea that’s got her panties in a bunch!

Not only are they claiming that Russell blindsided her with the divorce filing, but he’s writing his memoirs with juicy gossip about their marriage.

A snitch revealed, “Katy is insulted and feels betrayed that Russell has treated her so poorly. She will never forgive him. Ever.”

The spy went on to say, “He’s being so atrocious that she feels like she never knew him.”

Is this the work of the Katy Perry machine Kardashian’ing her way to further fame by looking like the victim? And yes, I just used “Kardashian” as a verb. You’re welcome.

What does she have to worry about anyways? It’s not like she was feasting nightly on cupcakes decorating his body parts. Unless she was….but no one wants to hear about that. Right?

Photo Credit: Revolution Pix, PacificCoastNews.com

Russell Brand didn’t really have much of a comment on his marriage to Katy Perry when recently asked about it, but now Us Weekly is reporting that he is planning on penning a tell all book about their marriage!

Talk about making a 180 turn on his views! Do you think it’s true?!??

According to the tabloid’s report, Russell is writing a shocking tell all that she will never forgive him for. They report on their latest magazine cover that Katy’s nightmare is coming true as Russell plots to reveal their darkest marriage secrets in his book. What does he plan on revealing?!??

It’s been rumored that she wanted him back, but that’s likely out of the window now that he’s going to write an entire book on the time that they spent together. Don’t you think?

Also featured in this issue is Angelina Jolie snubbing George Clooney’s girlfriend, Stacy Keibler. In addition to that, they’ve got a report on Chris Brown and his former victim Rihanna getting back together. Could it be true?

Lastly, they are featuring Heather Locklear’s breakdown and how her former boyfriend, Jack Wagner, begged her to go to rehab. I think that one has a certain ring of truth to it…don’t you? Her family has said that they want her to go to a medical rehab facility in order to get better. So it’s really unknown how long she has been mixing Xanax and alcohol… Let’s hope that she gets the help that she needs!

Stay tuned to Earsucker for the latest scoop!

Everyone seems to know the exact reason why things went south between Katy Perry and Russell Brand. Now, Us Weekly is jumping on the “he’s crazy” bandwagon. It must be the eyes. Either that, or they’ve seen Arthur once too many times.

Apparently they’ve gotten Katy’s side of the divorce story, talking about their final fights and her “shocking” discoveries. Also, of course, he blindsided her with the divorce. I’m not buying that for a minute. She wasn’t blindsided, she was out in Hawaii for Christmas without her ring, as he was in London not wearing his. She knew that was coming. I believe the religious aspect of their tale and that it’s quite possible that she asked him to do the filing because of her beliefs.

I want to know what she shockingly discovered! Is Russell Brand gay? Did she find him with another woman? Has he fallen off of the wagon? Did his forehead come alive like something out of The Thing and attack her while she was sleeping? What was it?!?

Also in this issue, Justin Timberlake’s proposal to long-time girlfriend, Jessica Biel. In addition to that, the newest Bachelor, Ben Flajnik, disses former Bachelorette, Ashley Hebert. For filler, they’ve got a photo of Rihanna and the title “How stars get thin fast”. LIPOSUCTION. Duh.

Kim Kardashian graces the latest cover of Us Weekly — in a bikini, no less. Does she look different to you? It can’t be just us, right? Did the photoshopper in charge of this cover go crazy with the effects or has Kim gotten something done to her face? We’re going with Photoshop, what do you think?

Kim is now claiming to be a size 2, because we weren’t flabbergasted enough when her gigantic rear-end claimed to be a 4 last year. If her waist is a 2, then her butt must be a 22.

Here’s the scoop on her feature in the tabloid:

Steers clear of sugar
The onetime sweets lover has dropped refined sugar from her diet. “Changing my eating habits makes a big difference,” the E! star tells US of keeping her size-2 body trim. Her healthy menu? “I wake up and eat eggs with turkey bacon, then salad for lunch and fish, pasta or chicken for dinner.

Goes organic
The newly single 5-foot-2 star has been inspired by big sister Kourtney, 32. “She’s taught me to eat more organically,” admits Kardashian, who has also downed wheatgrass shots with her sis. “She’s a bit extreme, but slowly I’m learning to love it.”

Sweats it out – hard!
There are no water breaks during the 31 year-old’s hour-long sessions with Gunnar Peterson. “Every minute is accounted for,” says the trainer. “You go from running to pull-ups to lunges to crunches to overhead presses. You get more work done in the same time.”

Can’t you just imagine Kim running around for EVERY minute, trying to work that butt off? Us neither, because, obviously, that gigantic scary thing is still behind her.

Now that Jennifer Lopez has filed for divorce from Marc Anthony and has been running around with Casper Smart, apparently her divorce is getting ugly!

She filed for divorce in July, so why is he still bitter and upset?!? Apparently, he doesn’t like her new relationship with 24-year-old backup dancer, Casper. Why not? He’s been getting along with their kids just fine!

Us Weekly reports:

When the Latin crooner spotted photos of Lopez and Smart bonding with his son and daughter during a Thanksgiving vacation in Kauai, Hawaii, he “hit the roof,” one source says. “It caused a huge blowup.”

Even though they have already worked out a deal for custody of their twins, Max and Emme, a source has revealed that he may go back on his word. The source said, “He wants to make Jennifer suffer because she’s having fun with someone new, and he knows this will hurt her on the deepest level.”

Another friend said that Jennifer is “ready to smash him if he tries anything. It’s getting vicious.”

Uh oh! This is going to get worse before it gets better! Let’s hope that they can be mature about their split because the only ones it will affect in the end are their children. What do you think?

Gracing the cover of the latest issue of Us Weekly is the Royal couple, Prince William and Kate Middleton. They’re having their first Christmas at the Palace — and her parents aren’t invited!

According to the tabloid, the happy Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are doing it up for the holidays, but haven’t invited her family along for the festivities. Isn’t that just mean? Why not invite everyone for a huge celebration?!?

The cover of the magazine reveals that they will have gag gifts, elaborate parties and Kate is set to wear five outfits per day! Also featured in this issue are Diana’s private holiday photos and why she hated spending Christmas with the Queen.

Also in this issue, they talk about why Sandra Bullock is scared to date. It might be because the last guy she was with, cheated on her with some tattooed up trashbucket, but that’s just our opinion. Either that, or she doesn’t want to bring any random guys around her adorable son, Louis.

Photo Credit: Us Magazine

Maybe Khloe Kardashian is really super jealous that her sister Kourtney is pregnant for a second time. Earlier, we reported on In Touch Weekly’s claims that Kourtney Kardashian is pregnant and alone, with both of her sisters seemingly turning their backs on her. Now, Us Weekly claims that Khloe will do anything for a baby with husband, Lamar Odom.

According to Us Weekly’s latest issue, Khloe is starting IVF so that she can get pregnant. They claim that she is thrilled for Kourtney and Scott, but is desperate to start her own family.

Also featured in this issue is Angelina Jolie, who is apparently starving herself. Teen Mom Jenelle Evans has been “destroyed” by her mother. Also, Kristen Stewart’s nightmare, which we reported on earlier in the week — Is Rob Pattinson cheating?!?

Poor Khloe. She’s the only one of the Kardashians that we can actually stand. Let’s hope that this isn’t just a ploy for publicity and that she can actually have babies, like she wants.

Also, we don’t really believe that Rob is cheating on Kristen, but it’s more likely that he was just hanging out with Sarah Roemer, because she used to work with Kristen.

What do you think?

Photo Credit: Us Magazine

According to the latest issue of Us Weekly, Kris Humphries used to call soon-to-be ex-wife Kim Kardashian fat. Well he would be partly correct, wouldn’t he? Her butt is huge! But that’s likely because she has had fat injected into it and/or butt implants.

Now comes the media train against Kris, driven by the Kardashian machine. He spoke out once to say that he was going through a difficult time and all of the sudden he’s like the anti-Christ of husbands. Go figure.

A source said, “He belittled her in front of people. He’d call her stupid. It was truly sickening.”

The source also revealed that Kris resented Kim’s fame and fortune, saying, “He tried to control Kim by bringing her down. He would say truly terrible things. One time, he said she had no talent and her fame wouldn’t last.”

I have to point out that it wouldn’t necessarily be “belittling” if it were the truth, right? Does she have any discernible talent? My guess is no. Will her fame last? Not if I have anything to say about it.

Us Weekly has more:

He even took exception to her world-famous posterior, calling her “fat ass,” the source says.

And when Kardashian (who rarely drinks and tends to go to bed early) asked her man to skip the nights out in favor of quality time, “He would tell her she was acting like too much of a wife and ‘get over it,’” another insider says.

What do you think? Why are they trying to turn everyone against Kris? Doesn’t it seem odd to you?

Us Magazine is hopping on the Prince William and Duchess Catherine baby train with their latest issue. Apparently the happy Royal couple are ready for a baby! Even though In Touch Weekly and Star magazine have both got her pregnant and collapsing.

According to their reports, Kate wants a boy — and a girl! Kate is preparing to be a first-time mother as Will’s duties overseas put their new marriage to the test!

They are also reporting that Cameron Diaz and Diddy are dating, which is something that has already been debunked.

Also featured in this issue is Robert Pattinson looking to marry Kristen Stewart — for real. In addition to that, they are claiming that Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher took a nice vacation to get away from all of that cheating business and try to work on saving their marriage.

So are they or aren’t they having a baby? I’m confused. We’ll wait for the official Palace confirmation. Until then, there’s always those Duchess of Cornwall rumors, right?

Mariah Carey gave birth to twins Moroccan and Monroe on April 30, 2011 — and now she’s looking good! You go girl!

The songbird is featured on the cover of the latest issue of Us Weekly magazine in some size six bootie shorts (and not a Kirstie Alley size six, either). Mariah revealed that she has lost a total of 30 pounds since giving birth. Nice!

She said, “I gained an enormous amount of weight.”

Us Magazine reports:

How’d she slim down? Beginning in July, Carey buckled down with a nutritionist and a workout plan from Jenny (formerly Jenny Craig), keeping to a 1,500-calorie-a-day menu and thrice-weekly workouts.

“I feel incredible,” the “Fly Like a Bird” singer tells Us, three months after her body transformation began. She and Cannon, 31, famously struggled to conceive their twins (born via C-section at 35 weeks) after a heartbreaking miscarriage.

She added, “It was a huge blessing to be able to have the babies. But I felt trapped in my body because I couldn’t move. I’m proud of how hard I worked to get my body back….I had to do this for me.”

She looks great!

Oh bother, it’s going to be one of those days. Another tabloid cover comes out and it’s the same regurgitated nonsense about Kim Kardashian’s divorce. I have to wonder if she’s profiting from all of these stories about her today.

It’s the day that the magazines come out and her mug is splattered over all of them. We’re still waiting for the “Divorce Baby” story to get released. Will one of the tabloids say that Kim thought a baby would save their marriage? It’s coming, I can feel it.

On the cover of the latest issue of Us Weekly, Kim says that she almost called off her wedding to Kris Humphries. Despite what she has said, she most likely profited quite a bit from marrying Lurch. Her momager said that she didn’t make a penny from the wedding, but why else would you clutter up your wedding and honeymoon with paparazzi and camera crews? It surely wasn’t because she was a nice person, that’s for sure.

Was she trying to call off her wedding to Kris, so that she could get back together with Reggie Bush? I’ve heard rumors that she still has feelings for him. Anything is possible, right? It’s only love if you let the guy pee on you….at least that’s the rumor.

The latest issue of Us Weekly magazine is all about Jennifer Lopez’s secret romance with hunky actor Bradley Cooper!

It’s been rumored for a while that she and Bradley were getting it on, most notably after they shared a dinner together last month. That dinner, they tried to blow off to the public and media, as just a business dinner.

Then, even more recently, they were seen getting into his car after another date.

According to the magazine, Bradley pursued her for weeks with late-night calls and intimate dinners. They claim to have the scoop on why J-Lo took a chance on him. Well, here’s a good reason: He’s freakin’ hot! What else is there?!?

Also featured in this issue is Prince Harry’s wild American parties, Twilight’s Nikki Reed has shared her wedding album and Shannen Doherty’s three wedding dresses on her big day.

What did you think of Jennifer and Bradley hooking up? Do you think he or she can do better? Sound off in the comments below and let us know what you think!

Ashton Kutcher’s rumored mistress, Sara Leal, appears on the cover of the latest issue of Us Weekly magazine.

Inside the issue, Sara reveals how she was seduced by Ashton and how they partied in his hotel room at the Hard Rock Hotel in San Diego.

She said, “He just came up and kissed me.”

She went on to reveal that minutes later, she was naked with Ashton and another woman in the hot tub. She said, “I didn’t think it was out of the ordinary. I wasn’t self-conscious about getting naked.”

He reportedly told her that he had separated from his wife, Demi Moore, and she believed him.

After going back to his bedroom with him, she said, “He lost his towel and I took my robe off. Then we had sex. He was good. It wasn’t weird or perverted.”

Us Weekly reports:

The post-coital talk was a little unexpected, she confesses; the duo talked astrology (they’re both Aquarius), religion, love, even politics. “I told him I was a Lutheran from Texas. He said, ‘Oh my gosh! Are you a Republican?’” Leal says.

Democratic-leaning Kutcher quizzed her on “up-and-coming candidates. I said Rick Perry. He asked if I’d vote for him. I said I didn’t know and he laughed. He laughed at pretty much everything I said.”

Do you believe her? What do you think of her comments on Ashton? Do you think he cheated on Demi with Sara? Sound off in the comments below and let us know what you think!